IMPOSSIBLE -> I’M POSSIBLE: Remove Your Limiting Beliefs

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Nothing is impossible, the word itself says I’m possible.
— Audrey Hepburn

Throughout my life I have been surrounded by limiting beliefs and, until this year, I did not even know what limiting beliefs were or that I had them.

Growing up I quit every team sport I tried, at the time I always told my self that “I just don’t like team sports that much.”
I pretended to play at the band concerts because I didn’t want to take away from the players that were better.
I never sung out loud because I could not carry a tune, even though I really enjoy music (I still can’t by the way).
I was always very resistant to dancing because I did not have a rhythm.
I would not read in front of the class because I had a speech impediment.
I would never share any of my writing, correction, I would not write. Because I had poor spelling and lacked any grace with writing.

I have been surrounded by limiting beliefs, some given to me by myself, and some (not intentionally) placed on me by others. Even though the above list was in the past tense, I still feel the same way and still have those limitations. The difference is, that now I can choose whether to listen to those limiting beliefs or to ignore them completely.

What I have come to discover over the last few years is that no one starts off great at anything. Instead what seems to happen is someone is born with a certain talent; an ability to carry a tune for example. This gives them immediate joy when singing as everyone around them expresses how great of a singer they are. In turn, this encourages the individual to sing more which of course makes them a better singer.

I think anyone can learn anything. It will just vary in difficulty and enjoyment, but there is nothing that is out of reach of the determined individual.

The key is to setup a road map for success, and to remove the limiting beliefs.

I have started many new hobbies and now I find it rewarding to start from nothing with the beginners mindset. By doing so many things people often think that I have a special talent to be able to do so much. The truth is anything but, it all comes down to one thing.

Accepting sucking at the new while enjoying the process of learning.

As humans we like to avoid pain, and especially as we get further along in life we avoid learning completely new things. Whether this is a new skill, a hobby, or a technology. We avoid learning the new because it is painful to work on something we are bad at. However, the joy of having the beginners mindset and being able to see immediate progress is so rewarding and with a small mindset shift anything is possible. Learning a skill, or starting something completely new is actually really enjoyable if you:

1) Believing that everything is figureoutable. The key to learning is to find a way to relate the new knowledge to something that you already know. This will make the new skill relatable. For example, launching an online business is extremely overwhelming and has so many required steps to be successful, but it is much easier once you realize that the required skills for an online business are very similar to those you use in your everyday life. For example, sales is just a type of story telling. For the rest of the steps you can just learn them one at a time, relating each to something you already know.

2) Believing that you will get better. Often times when we are looking for help we do not see the beginner, instead we see the expert. This can be very intimidating, as we find their level of skill to be un-relatable and this leaves us feeling inferior. It is important to remember that they started off as a beginner as well and just like them, you will get better.

When I was learning how to cook (sorry parents the boiled veggies did not count), I was so overwhelmed by the amount of information out there and really had no idea where to start. This is true with almost every single field now, it is no longer about not having enough information, instead it is about having way too much information and not knowing where or how to start.

So for cooking I decided to commit to a few months of full effort:

I read cook books
I watched youtube videos
I watched Top Chef and Masterchef
I did Gordon Ramsay’s Masterclass.
I cooked a lot!

This is a technique I have repeated time and time again. Complete submersion for a few months in order to gain massive and rapid improvement.

Commitment to a few months of complete submersion can work wonders, as it allows you enough practice to get past the initial phase of sucking (the white belt phase), and into experiencing the improvements of your skills. Often we will spend years doing something but never get any better, instead it simply remains the same and brings us no more joy or sense of accomplishment.

1) The first step to achieving anything you want is identifying what you truly desire (any Lucifer fans out there?). One thing is for certain, it is much more difficult to get what you want if you do not know what that is.

2) After identifying what you want, map out what a roadmap for success would look like. The key here is to focus on the process, not on the outcome.

3) Next identify what is most likely to cause failure. Come up with a solution to prevent it.

4) State any limiting beliefs you have and reword them to empower you.

A person doesn’t earn $100,000 a year because they want $100,000 a year. They earn $100,000 a year because they don’t know how to earn that a month

— Bob Proctor

Using my blog as an example:

1) What does success look like? My blog is all about helping others, so success would be generating organic traffic and having people commenting that I have helped them. Long term success would be becoming an authority within life coaching, having clients, becoming an author and a speaker. Essentially, I view my level of success by how many people I can impact.

2) What is the roadmap? In order for me to be successful I will need to put in the work and play the long game. I know that it takes a long time to gain traffic, and to improve the skill of story telling and writing. So my best chance for success will be to create a daily practice, and focus on constantly writing and sharing; while trying to make each article a little better. In addition to working on my craft each day, I also should start working with clients sooner rather than later. Theory and sharing is great but helping people is the end goal so why wait?

3) What is most likely to cause failure? I can see failure coming from two primary sources. Trying to do too much too soon, and burning out from not seeing any progress. The other reason for failure is to rely too heavily on success for supporting my family. If I went all in on coaching I would become stressed if I did have a large client base, or if my posts were not going viral. Therefore to avoid this, I need to play the long game and slowly build an audience with a sustainable amount of work.

4) Limiting beliefs. My biggest limiting belief is that people will not resonate with me. I am worried that after all of the countless hours I have put into learning, improving, and sharing, that no one will actually find it helpful. In order to rewrite this limiting belief I tell myself the following. “All I need to help is one person and it’s all worth it.” If even one person can take my knowledge and the pain I have gone through and use it to improve their life than it is worth it. PS: chances are if one person finds it helpful, then others will as well.

Summary

Humans are extremely versatile creatures and we can adapt to almost any environment. But, this can be a double edged sword because it also means that we not only can thrive anywhere but we can also struggle in any environment. Even though from the outside someone’s situation may look perfect, they can still be struggling. I see this so often, and it’s okay to know that even though someone else may want exactly what you have, that does not mean it is what you want. Needs and wants change over time, we must accept this and constantly be open and aware that we may need to adapt or “start over” in order to live our best lives.

If you want to learn something, if you want to start a new career, if you want to just stop doing something you no longer find joy in, you can. It is okay to start over (the truth is that we are never truly starting over because we still have all of the skills and experiences that we have already learned, and this builds a much more stable base for even higher growth).

We come up with limiting beliefs in order to protect ourselves. These limiting beliefs not only protect us but also hold us back from achieving what we really want in life, and remember just like an iceberg there is so much more to us that just what you can see on the surface.

Comment below:
What is it that you want in life but are too scared to start?
What are your limiting beliefs?